..To Those Who Raised Me...

This is in response to a blog my mother wrote about me leaving home for work:
http://revdonc.wordpress.com/2008/08/09/its-a-new-season/#comment-112

I've always found interesting the different perspectives that make a whole picture. I think it's becoming easier to see things from other people's points of view as I get older. I've always wanted to get out on my own, have my own life, take my own journey. But as I got older, and I realized the different directions my journey might pull me in, I started to realize the conflict that was building inside of me as well. I've alway longed for more than what I had- not so much because I was ungrateful, but more so I believe because I know God's promise for me, and I want it. But now my journey has pulled me away from my family, at least physically. It's hard to make these choices, knowing that also as I have grown older the importance of family has grown within me. I think I experience that same conflict, wanting to be close to home and with my family but at the same time needing to stretch my wings and go for what I've always wanted.

I too felt a difference between my previous departures from the house and this time. In every time before, I knew I was coming back. This time, it really hit me that I was moving...starting my life in another place, for however long that may last. And this time it is not guarenteed- I may be here a year...two or three...or many more. It's a hard reality to swallow at times. When I look at myself in the mirror I see a boy still, a little kid. I don't feel like an adult. But I know I am. I have a job. A real one, where people will look to me to be the expert, to be the problem-solver. Am I ready? I do not know. I worry every day that I will be revealed as a fake, someone who is all talk but doesn't know anything e's talking about. I worry that the people at Wake Forest will wonder, "Why in the world did we hire this person?" But I try to take comfort in the knowledge that I DO know what I am talking about, I am competent, and have always been blessed with success...
....and I was raised by the most wonderful and amazing parents anyone could have asked for. Raised in such a way that it is recognized by everyone I encounter. That I have been taught, and taught well, how to be a man.

Even as my journey leads me away from those who know me best, I will never forget nor take for granted those who have made me who I am today:

Donna and Gerald Cox

My parents.